[SML] Old joke request

Thu Feb 27 19:46:56 UTC 2020

I'm cleaning out old emails and stumbled across this one. I have to say,
when I was an intern fresh out of college in 1997, I am the one who started
that "Signs You've Been in the Theatre Too Much" list (retitled "You've
been a techie too long", which is a T-word I don't use). A couple have been
added to the end over the years, and some of my favorites gone missing, but
it still gives me a smile when I see how viral it went. I think I first
posted on rec.arts.theatre.stagecraft at some point. I think this was my
original list of 18:

1. Your weekend consists of Monday, and only Monday.
2. "Q" is not just a letter.
3. National holidays that fall on Monday seem pointless to you.
4. You know more than one theory for the origin of the name "green room."
5. You can only read from a light that is blue.
6. You consider the red part of the stoplight the "standby."
7. You can't remember what daylight looks like.
8. You feel naked without your keys attached to your belt loop, or your belt
without your Maglite, Leatherman, and Gerber.
9. 95% of your wardrobe is black.
10. You know anything can be fixed with gaff tape,
11. Your diet consists of fast food or microwaved food.
12. Varying your diet means ordering the #2 instead of the #3 or eating with
your left hand instead of your right.
13. You insist on spelling "theatre" with an "re" not an "er".
14. People recognize you by the sound of your keys jingling down the
hallway.
15. Going to a restaurant means ordering and sitting down in McDonald's
rather than the drive-thru.
16. "Practical" and "flat" are nouns.
17. Instead of saying that you're leaving, you say you're "exiting."
18. If someone asks you what time it is, you respond with something like,
"Half hour 'til half hour."

Memories!
*--*
*Erin Joy Swank*
*Stage Manager*
Portfolio Reviews & Interview Materials Prep (PRIMP
<https://www.usittshow.com/professional-reviews>) Coordinator, USITT

937-308-0366 cell
erinjoyswank at gmail.com
www.erinjoyswank.com
Pronouns: She/her/hers (What's this?
<https://www.mypronouns.org/what-and-why>)

*UPCOMING:*
Portfolio Reviews & Interview Materials Prep (PRIMP
<https://www.usittshow.com/professional-reviews>) Coordinator, Sessional
Panelist, and Stage Management Mentorship Project mentor, USITT National
Conference <https://www.usitt.org/conference>, April 1-4

*Member: Actors' Equity Association (AEA), **American Guild of Musical
Artists (AGMA), *
*Stage Managers' Association (SMA), and United States Institute for Theatre
Technology (USITT)*

On Wed, Sep 4, 2019 at 5:41 PM Pietrie, Joe via Stagecraft <
stagecraft at theatrical.net> wrote:

> I have been collecting Jokes and Stories for techies for years now.  Not
> everyone fits your format, but I have been looking for a way to share these
> with others.  Attached are copies of what I have ready at this time,
> ENJOY.
> Joe
>  You Have been a Techie too long,if..pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtVFlZb3cycTMyVkxUcjYzV0VzbU1BQmFRZTFZ/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Techie "100" Codes of sayings.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtcWpfWGpsQVNzeFNVRTdRdEJJUU1oVlA4VlpR/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Quick Prayers and Mottos.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtY2wzMUYyS2NqZEdQRjhVcnVtRENVU3dLUFNZ/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  25 ways to abuse your power.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtZmFXQ1NiQk5vMXVXbkxZRlNyejFUS0JYc0Rz/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Things not to ask in Techs.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtNTJxVDRPX21Yc2tTb1dQeVpHVUFsVURKdWlj/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  You know you workToo Long in non proffit theatr...
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/1kbG2FYAQQxMiniYwj7tJcOmxoc38GOdi/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  25 Statements Made During Tech Week.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtY2k4OEZhVHJBNWtuUU5XRDJlRkwxWTA0clpJ/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Techies Keeping the faith.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtWF9fWHNhb0VHNjNTUUd1RGtSY0xTaWZ4dkNr/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  You Might Be a tech nerd.....pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtN3QtdkszQWowdkJJbFZUY0plRGtJVlJEbUpB/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  The Techie Gospel.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtXzBMQTlzWmdXTDVuWGpLWklSUmp1ODVSUXZr/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Techie Niche.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtVE1nSTlKM0lpdkJ6QXZJNDRzcWxTMnBzcW1Z/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>  Not My Fault of techies.pdf
> <https://drive.google.com/a/d303.org/file/d/0BxjnualuSuJtSTJUS180M0p4MkF1bHRwVF9PV3Y0cGtVdk9Z/view?usp=drive_web>
>
>
> Joseph Pietrie
>
>   Auditorium Manager
>
>   St. Charles North High School
>
>   255 Red Gate Road, St. Charles, IL 60175
>
>
>
> St. Charles CUSD 303 <http://district.d303.org/>
>
> Office, 331-228-6355
>
> Cell, 630-918-1035
>
> <https://www.facebook.com/St-Charles-North-High-School-629443583801854/>
> <https://www.instagram.com/stcharlesd303/>
>
>
> On Wed, Sep 4, 2019 at 4:06 PM Derek Leffew via Stagecraft <
> stagecraft at theatrical.net> wrote:
>
>> Love tech theatre puns.  Here’s a few of my favs.
>>
>> “The dimmers won’t dim smoothly.  The followspots aren’t very bright.
>> The battens aren’t level.  The Costume Shop says they’re out of trim.”
>>
>> “What do you call a rigger who can’t combine multiple lines into one?
>> Clew-less.”
>>
>> Many years ago in college, long before Makita screwguns, my professor in
>> his most southern drawl asks the innocent co-ed, “What you fixin’ to do
>> with that Yankee, Miss Margaret?”
>>
>> “The TD said to cover the flats with muslim.  Should we pray to Allah?”
>>
>>
>>
>> ----------------
>> Visit my website at http://www.derekleffew.com/ and read my blog.  Fun
>> for all ages!
>> ____________________________________________________________
>> For list information see <http://stagecraft.theprices.net/>
>> Stagecraft mailing list
>> Stagecraft at theatrical.net
>> http://theatrical.net/mailman/listinfo/stagecraft_theatrical.net
>>
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